Hmmmm....

Right

What is righteous? who is righteous? who is not? and who decides that? These questions can only be answered by subjective introspection.What we believe to be good or evil is only our skewered perception of it.It varies with people, their history, and I hate to say it but their race.

Even Osama bin Ladin thought he was doing the right thing by killing thousands of people. How does that work?.How could he possibly convince himself that what his actions were righteous. To his mind, his actions were somehow going to defend Islam from the US. Does that mean he did it out of self defense? Hardly.

The question is how do people define whats right and whats wrong on a personal level. The closest answer that I've ever got to this question is given by GDR in Shantaram.He says that the only way we can say for sure if something is righteous, is to think about what would happen if everybody starts doing it. For eg. if everyone starts donating to the poor, bye bye poverty.Similarly if everyone starts robbing everyone else, bye bye everyone else.

I think there is this broken side in all of us, filled with hatred, misery and sadistic virtues, that makes us evil.Why do you think we cant get rid of corruption.Its because we blame a certain section of the society (politicians).What we do not realize is that the politicians do not drop out of the sky.They live, grow and come out of the same society that we live in.Its not just them, its all of us. We are inherently evil and try to find ways of convincing ourselves otherwise.

We believe what we want to believe.

Ballad of the prodigal Indian

Yes.Its exactly what you think.
I'm actually surprised I haven't written about this yet.The other day I went over to my cousin's farm house.Along the way I saw hundreds of those white-kurta-clad-self-appointed-neta-assistants that we are all too familiar with.I couldn't help wondering...who the fuck are these people?..where the fuck do they come from?...who the fuck are they supporting?...or representing?...or opposing?
Truth is, more often than not,they don't have a fucking clue!
Later in the day, I was hanging out with my cousin in the election area (it was some zila level election crap).We were supposed to vote for one of the candidates who happened to be related to us.I asked one of the "karyakartas" (party workers) :
"kaunse pe thappa marna hai?"
"khadi deewar"
"heh?" (I thought he was naming some b grade movie)
"khadi deewar"
We exchanged puzzled looks.The party worker was giving me the stink eye like I was the dumb-fuck!
My uncle came and explained that the sign we were looking for was a "standing wall".I wanna meet the genius who came up with this one.
I cannot blame people for being cynical about Indian politics,I am, in fact, one of them .Heck! I don't even expect people to try and change things, because I know it cannot be done.What I do want however is for us to get these dimwit-biker-boys off the 100 bucks a day payroll that they thrive on year after year,only to support both sides of the election.There are just too many of them.
I think there's a reason they have the same dress code for politicians and funerals.

Jai hind

exodus

we exist to bear witness.
we had to be.
the infinite needs us to perceive it.
without the perceiver ,
the perceived does not exist.
that gives us leverage.
Don't look until you get what you want.

surprise me!

Things have ceased to surprise me anymore. I don’t know why. More so because i’m supposed be. My inability to appreciate the ephemeral wave of nascent events hinders the possibility of the tiny orgasm one gets when pleasantly surprised. It bothers me. Have I been-there-done-that? Not enough to make me lose my surprise boner.

And i am not talking about the unpleasant ones simply because they just keep on coming. You could be a 100 years old and seen the world, but you can never really say which screw up is going to happen this time. May be that’s why managers hate surprises...can you blame them?.

But why does everything seem mundane? Even when i’m doing it for the first time. Playing a new game...talking to some new chick...going to cool places...everything has lost its lusture. Maybe i’m doing all the above at the wrong time, or may be i’m just at the wrong place.

I’m not high right now...so i guess i’ve got problems.

Peace bros

One love.

The Funnel of Fate

In life three things are certain ...death, taxes and the fact that most of your plans will crash and burn. What survives is mostly the plan-B that you thought were the last resort.You inevitably pass through that funnel of fate where all you are left in the end with, is what you could have got anyway.That funnel/tunnel is like a home to me now.

You start with the whole plan of plans. You cant help it...you gotta make a plan, coz if something goes wrong...you'll need the plan. But then you realise you wanted to be spontaneous...and before you know it...you'll be planning your spontaneity.So you start all over again,creating a vicious circle of plans.I hate plans!

But i do realise that my plans have never worked,especially in love.Everything you plan is ultimately a spontaneous co-incidence.My habit of imagining all the possible ways of glory somehow gets into my way of getting it.Maybe the forces of nature are telepathic, or maybe i think too much...either way i'm not getting the grape.

So where's the juice?. I guess is in the beaker that reads: "fuck the plan! Be spon-fuckin-taneous!"

hoo-aah!!!

directions...

Time.... I wanna kill it.... Atleast right now. Which is why i am writing this blog.it is completely unintentional . so if you have more important things to do right now...do them...(don’t even think about it pal...sit your butt down and read).

This one’s going to be my first experience of writing down my memoirs(of things that i do...mostly not worth remembering...but its not about that right now is it?)

Hip hop’s keepin me alive these days. Am kinda noddin my head to nelly’s ‘stepped on my j’s ’...that guy Jermaine dupri looks like shit...but makes up for it by rapping it tight.

Exams on. Means readin like i’m being paid for it...a lot...havin coffee like my life depends on it...thinkin about chicks i don’t even know...or how it ‘d be nice to know them...and then suddenly realising its 5 am and still about 4 units to go.

To add to the agony...mba entrance seems to be slippin outta hand...CAT bit me on my ass and iift sprinkled salt and pepper on to the wound. the rest of them don’t look like dettol right now.

I am essentially ‘alone’...in all senses of the word. I need to get somewhere...not sure where...but definitely not here. The harder i’m trying the less likely it seems. I hate this phase. I’m not even sure its going to be over anytime soon.

S.O.S

S.O

S

CHAOS and his Minions

“The way it was …the way I’d rather it be.”
Whoever said “god made the universe” wasn’t at terms with his own random existence. What are we but a consequence of an instance of sheer chance? The world we live in and its painful uniqueness…is it not proof enough of the randomness that we all thrive in? And yet fail to acknowledge it
There is a certain beauty, if you look at it from outside the sphere of your skeptical influences. To the chaos around you. To me it gives an ephemeral sense of living without boundaries, without the boundations of ethical or moral vocabulary, and without that binding notion of accountability to any one…even god.
This sense of free existentialism is always blasphemed by the “schemers” and their unprovoked deeds of order. The utter need for everything to be in line with the “scheme” disturbs me. Why should this order be forced on things that were meant to be out of order, and who has proof that the order, that they advocate as god’s will, is really so?.
Chaos and order, some say, are in perfect harmonial balance. Yin and yang…positive and negative…even and odd…man and woman…yes you saw that right!
No I’m neither a sexist, nor gender biased. I only feel that the balance, if it does exist, is best exemplified by man and woman. Skeptical? Well then how do you explain the fact that god/nature created two sexes …not three, not four…but “two”. To me that says something, that it was meant to create that balance. And to bias myself, let me go ahead and say that man is the chaotic thriver, and woman the balancing act.
Chaos and ‘his’ minions work in and through all of us. Some of us go ahead and embrace it…the rest of us are always undone by our greed for more.
Chaotic existentialism guarantees two things- satisfaction and self control, as you will never know what you want most, and the only thing that you can possibly control is yourself.
The force be with you

Of Chicks, College, & Being ALIVE!!!

Dear non-existant readers…

Since I have failed time and again to come up with any block buster stuff to write…I’m still going to write regular crap to make my self feel better about myself…or take a break from my critical self-abomination.

This time I shall deep-fry you in some shit-load about my college and my acute derogatory diagnosis of it.

Starting with the most important and serious matter…girls. What the fuck is their problem?

the age old cliché in my college is that chicks try n show that the guys in the college are’nt good enough …may be in terms of looks,may be intelligence(I agree with this one only) or anything they think is missing.

Let me share my personal experience first. The moment I entered the college I was brainwashed with stuff like ”make your move now or all the good ones will taken”…or “when u see a chick…think of your seniors first”…wat crap?...

Anyway I heeded to their sermons and made my move…I wont give out any names…I mean I’d tell you but then I’d have to kill myself.and much sooner that I thought …I was famous in the college for getting dumped before even getting accepted. I swear to god, If I could go back in time!!!.

Any way, I vowed never to try the stunt again in my college, for the outer world holds much greater pleasures than one can ever find here. So I moved on (not that I was emotionally connected or anything)

The moral is …KIET chicks are a farce!!... not because they say no…because they are not willing to try. And this is not for all chicks so please don’t sue me.

This by no means implies that the dudes are any good…coz I can count the good ones on my fingers.

Now coming to the lesser important issues like administration…well what can I say…improve the system …think outside the box…be efficient…and some related shit.

The director of my college by the way is not human according to scientists. They believe he is a cross between a hippocrit rhino and a shrewd but softspoken fox…and that he has inherited the rhino’s physical features.

The only respite is the hostel …24/7 electricity n water…(not that we need the water). Playing games on LAN and watching movies is about as close as we get to an orgasm. And even that we sometimes fake.

And to top it all… there is never a single jam session/party/get-together .only fresher parties and farewells.

But I do love one thing …my friends here….i’d be dead without them…

untill next time…seeya fuckers!

Parental Advisory: Explicit Content: The Hip-Hop Blog

aite, this goes out to all those niggas who’re neck deep into hip-hop like I am……the sun comes out to shine for us freaks!..

this blog aims at scruitinising your knowledge of rap…and more probably than not , updating it!.

To define hip-hop succinctly, I’d say that it is the permutation and combination of the following lucid words…

Fuck (the root of all evil), suck, dick, nigga, bitch/biatch/beeyaach, wat-up, motha-fuckka, dawg,love, sex, weed, hole, bang,mammy,ass,butt,skin,etc etc (since u get d general idea)

Hip –hop to me is about the freedom of expression. in the name of a song u can sing any and everything under the sun,as long as any part of the sentence rhymes with any part of the next one.

For an eternity rap was about blacks…enter Eminem with a white boy’s ass which apparently was on fire. In a music genre that was bottomlined by 2pac shakur and redefined by the likes of 50-cent n the game, Eminem shattered the clichés and made his mark. The music sings for itself.

The thing I like about the niggas is dat they stand united as a community.the same people who were subjected to slavery now have set a culture that the whites now wanna be a part of,(Eminem)

Of course u’ve heard of that famous dictim…”once u go black…there ai’nt no goin back!!!”

Fuck yall n ur bitches

the higher plan

Ever wondered how it all began ?, how it all got put in the right…or rather perfect place?...who did this?...is it a coincidence?...was it god?...is there a god?...and if there is …why the hell does’nt he show himself???

These are some of the obscure yet perfectly sensible questions I never got the answer to…but I never gave up either. people of all religions, creeds, backgrounds and professions have their own takes on how we were created…right from the catholic version of the 7 days of god’s creative blitzkrieg, to the quite interesting hindu take on the issue.

What’s weird about the hindu version is that in every epic serial/sitcom that is about a particular god…that god is the sole center of the universe and everything else is its progeny. Not convinced?...turn on your T.V on Sunday at around 9 am and put on any family channel….then compare it with another similar religious drama. You’ll see!.

But the bottom line is- is there even a god?...or are we using him as a way of explaining things that we cant otherwise?...until sometime back I used to believe the latter…but then certain turn of events made me think otherwise. However god’s involvement does make anything hitherto unaccounted for, a regular acceptance of the event in the name of faith. It leaves no room for speculation.

The theories of how life began on earth are many…Darwin theory being the most profound of all. Although science can explain almost all there is to it , the loopholes still creep in. and they can subsequently be exploited by the skeptics. The creation of everything on earth is an example of the perfectionism of nature, and also an argument supporting the involvement of god.

The fact that we haven’t been able to find any substantial proof of life anywhere else (that we know of), says something to me- maybe we are unique, maybe there is a higher plan in all this, or may be not.

All said and done, it all comes down to what you believe, or more specifically what you choose to believe. I may turn into a skeptic and refuse to abide to any thing I cant touch or feel. But what do I achieve? On the other hand if I believe that there is a higher power that I can turn to, it gives me hope. It makes me content that if there is no one else for me…there is someone I can turn to.

So you may be a hardcore kick-ass spiritual entity, or a freelance- non believer…some questions will always be answered with-“it’s a matter of speculation”

Cheers!